It’s really simple. When it comes every year, it’s a siren song announcing loud and clear that your alone. Father’s Day as a Solo Mom sucks.
Every Year, It’s A Challenge
My son’s father died when he was two and a half. My daughter is a homegrown donor baby. My own father died a few years ago, and of course my husband isn’t here.
Similar to Mother’s Day, this annual celebration hits close to home. In both instances, there is no break, no other adult to round up the kids to acknowledge for one day that you’re a hero. Only, Father’s Day as a solo mom sucks because it’s the one day that not only are you doing it alone, this day hammers home that you’re doing it on your own.
My son has had to deal without a father all of his life. He’s extremely vocal – whenever someone asks about his father, he’s straight forward that he died. That’s a burden that I wouldn’t want on any one, much less a child. I’m a champion for my son, to help him shoulder a lack of father figure. To try to fill that role for him. But when Father’s Day comes, it takes my all to not succumb to the loss of his father, and my husband. Father’s Day as a solo mom sucks.
Then there’s my daughter. She’s just four, but realizes the differences between families. She’s been told that she has a Sky Daddy (my husband’s wish for another child), and that she doesn’t have a father. But really, this won’t make any sense for her for another year or two. The complexities of this situation is real, especially on Father’s Day.
Solo Moms, I See You
You’re doing it all. Taking care of your kids from wake-up to bedtime, and sometimes after. There’s no downtime for you. No other adult company to talk to . No one else to clean up after the little’s spill their cup for the umpteenth time. It’s you negotiating their spats. It’s you spending quality time with one, with your mommy sense out on the other knowing that their fuse time is getting close.
Twice a year – once in May, and then again in June – you have to power through these celebrations for mothers and fathers, without validation to your role as the ONLY PARENT. Father’s Day as a solo mom sucks.